Of Those Deceived By The Rat
by bbopalunaa
Summary: In the old Zodiac legend, both the Cat and the Ox were deceived by the Rat. This is a series of drabbles dedicated to the relationship of the two. Rating finally went up! HaruKyou
1. SemeUke Relationship

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Seme/Uke Relationship

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou

Word Count: 109

Rating: PG-15

Genre: Romance/(slight)Humor

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

In the year that Hatsuharu and Kyou had been together, Haru had gained more control over his Black side. He had been much more docile at home and even more so at school. The only time he seemed to have no control was during sex.

Because of his fear of Black Haru, (though he would never admit to fearing his own lover) Kyou was the uke in the relationship.

Not that Haru turned Black every time, Kyou just wanted to be safe. White Haru actually enjoyed receiving from time to time (though he would never admit to it).

But as Black Haru had once put it: "Black _never_ bottoms."

(A/N) Feedback and requests are much appreciated!


	2. Rumors

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Rumors

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou

Word Count: 201

Rating: PG

Genre: Humor/Romance

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

A group of four girls sat a few seats in front of Kyou gossiping. About him. And because of his cat-like senses, he could hear every word.

"I heard that Kyou Sohma is dating a first year. Can you believe it?"

"Are you serious?"

"That sucks! I wanted to date him!"

"So did I! I know most of the first year girls and none of them are good enough for him!"

Kyou tuned out of the conversation when he noticed Hatsuharu at the door to the classroom, motioning for him to come over. The cat-cursed smirked to himself as he stood up and made his way over toward the door, making sure to walk by the group of girls to get their attention. As predicted, their eyes followed his every move.

Kyou finally reached the door and Haru started talking immediately.

"Hey. Hatori wanted me to tell you th-" the ox-cursed was cut off as Kyou pulled him into a deep and passionate kiss.

The room went silent as everyone turned to stare at the two lovers. The silence was soon broken by the giggling of the four girls in the corner.

That, my friends, is how the four became fangirls.

(A/N) Feedback and requests are much appreciated!


	3. Apologies

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Apologies

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou

Word Count: 148

Rating: G

Genre: Romance

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

Kyou was awake, but he didn't want to open his eyes. If he did, he would have to get up and go to school. He didn't want to go to school. He didn't want to face Haru.

The couple had been fighting the night prior. Black Haru and a very pissed off Kyou did not do wonders for Shigure's house. The night had resulted in Haru sleeping on the couch.

Kyou finally gave in and looked over at the clock.

_/Twenty minutes until classes start. I guess the others already left. Haru better have gone with Tohru and the Rat. If he didn't he'll be lost for days. Stupid Cow…/_

The cat-cursed turned over to face Haru's vacant side of the bed. His eyes widened as he saw what lay on the pillow next to his. A rose and a note that simply read:

K,

I'm sorry.

-H

* * *

(A/N) Feedback and requests are much appreciated! 


	4. Piercings

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Piercings

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou and some Ayame/Shigure

Word Count: 329

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Humor

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

Haru had always been the kinky one. Kyou knew it. Haru knew it. Hell, half the Sohma family knew it. This is what drove Kyou to get his nipples pierced.

Needless to say, Hatsuharu liked that. That is what drove him to get his own nipples pierced.

One night, the two were getting quite _/cough/ _intimate. Haru was lying on top of Kyou, currently preoccupied with the older boy's mouth. The ox-cursed broke the lip lock and sat up. But he couldn't. Every time he tried to sit up, pain shot through his chest.

Haru finally looked down and noticed that his nipple ring was intertwined with his lover's.

The two fumbled with the metal rings for quite a few minutes, but made no progress. They not only failed to get them apart, but they couldn't even get them off.

Haru, who had given up hope after nearly half an hour, suggested that they seek Shigure's help. Kyou, being the stubborn cat he is, refused and continued working on detaching the two.

After twenty more minutes of fruitless labor, Kyou finally gave in.

And so, the lovers, clad in nothing but their boxers and attached at the nipple, set out to find Shigure.

Haru and Kyou soon reached the Dog's study. Haru opened the door a crack and peeked in.

"Hey Shigure, I-" he quickly closed the door. "I didn't need to see that…"

"What?"

"I never would have guessed that Ayame topped…" The cat-cursed gave his lover a strange look at this comment.

The boys stood there in silence for a few minutes, until Shigure came to the door. His face was red and, like his cousins, was wearing only boxers. He burst out laughing when he saw what had happened to the others.

That had been the longest night of both Kyou's and Haru's short lives. They had reason for it to be, as it contained a hysterical Shigure, a hysterical Ayame, and a pair of pliers.

* * *

(A/N) Sorry it's been taking so long…I haven't had internet access for the last week and I still don't…it's not quite fun typing this with your Research teacher breathing down your neck. Feedback and requests are much appreciated! 


	5. Sickness

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Sickness

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou

Word Count: 183

Rating: G

Genre: Pure fluff

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

"Hey Kyou, you feeling any better?" Haru made his way into Kyou's room carrying a large tray with a bowl of soup, a glass of water, and some pills.

The Ox's eyes settled on the bed against the opposite wall. He no longer saw his lover's sleeping form under the covers, as he did just minutes before.

Haru walked over to the bed and placed the tray on the bedside table. He then sat down on the corner of the bed and noticed for the first time the little orange neko swimming in Kyou's clothes.

The Ox-cursed gently picked up the half-sleeping Kyou and cradled him in his arms. The Cat awoke when Haru started to pet him.

"What the hell are you doing?" Kyou mumbled.

"I'm taking care of you."

"I can take care of myself."

"Not in this state. Now shut up and go back to sleep, Kitten."

"I told you, no pet names!"

"Oh, you know you like it."

Haru scratched behind Kyou's ears and the Cat-cursed began involuntarily purring. The sick Kitty soon fell asleep in his lover's arms.

* * *

(A/N) Well, I'm still having computer problems, but I now have access to another one! (but it's only supposed to be for homework, but fanfics are just as important, right?) Feedback and requests are much appreciated! 


	6. Some Things Are Just Too Damn Hard

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Some Things Are Just Too Damn Hard

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou

Word Count: 112

Rating: PG (if you all will get your minds out of the gutter!)

Genre: Humor

"Stop moving it like that Haru!"

"Well, then, how do you suggest I move it, my dearest Kitten?"

"Go to your right a little."

"It's still not going to fit. It's too big and you know it."

"Couldn't we just get a smaller one?"

"How could you even say that? Of course we can't! Now hold on for a minute...I need a break."

"Aw...is my pussy tired?"

"I told you not to call me that!" Kyou flopped onto the couch partially through the door of his and Haru's new apartment. The younger boy sat down next to his lover and the Cat-cursed sighed.

"Who knew that moving could be so damn hard?"

* * *

(A/N) Two in one week! Yay for me! Anyway, I know it's short, but I had this written for Gravitation and I never posted it, so I just threw it in here. Feedback and requests are much appreciated! 


	7. Prom

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Prom

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou and a little Yuki/Ritsu (I think they're cute together!)

Word Count: 349

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Romance/Humor

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

Notes: For hyper-writer14 who wanted a longer chapter. I'm not huge fan of this one, but I have an idea for a sequel to it.

* * *

Who ever would have guessed that this year's Prom King and Queen would have shared the same last name? The fact that they were both Sohmas, though, surprised no one. Their family was so extensive, half of them didn't even know that they were related.

The one thing that surprised everyone was that Yuki, yes, Prince Yuki, was not the one crowned King. He, in fact, was dateless. The Rat-cursed had rejected everyone who had asked him in hopes of bringing his lover, but Ritsu, being as shy as he was, backed out at the last minute.

The song ended and everyone vacated the dance floor, leaving only the King, Queen, and their Court. Another song began and those remaining started to dance.

The King wore a black and white tuxedo, identical to the shades of his hair. The red strapless dress that he had picked out for his date complimented the Queen's ruby eyes beautifully.

Yuki watched the couple dance and wondered why he hadn't jumped at the chance to bang one of his sexy cousins.

Tohru watched the couple dance and wondered why all of the hot Sohma guys were gay.

Uo watched the couple dance and wondered if the cameras that she had hidden in Kyou's room would be put to use tonight.

For some reason, Kyou seemed very confident in that dress, dancing with his boyfriend in front of the whole graduating class. Why, you may ask. No one but the Cat-cursed knew the answer to this.

Of course, the eight glasses of 'punch' that he had consumed throughout the night had absolutely nothing to do with it.

The song ended and Kyou clung to Haru in order to keep his balance. The stilettos that he was wearing did nothing to help stabilize him.

As soon as the two exited the floor, the Ox-cursed whispered in his lover's ear, "You ready to go home?"

"Hell yes! Let's go!" Kyou grabbed Hatsuharu's arm and dragged him out of the dance as fast as his legs would take him.

But only after falling on his face twice.

* * *

(A/N) Feedback and requests are much appreciated! 


	8. Cooking With Kyou!

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Cooking With Kyou!

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou

Word Count: 423

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Humor/Romance

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

Notes: For Dark Closure

Knowing full well that Shigure would be off with Hatori and Ayame today, Kyou skipped fourth period and when straight home after PE. Today was Hatsuharu's birthday and he wanted to surprise him with something special. And not the usual 'special', something a little more innocent. The other part could wait. Maybe.

When he was sure no one was home, Kyou entered the house and made his way into the kitchen. When he was _absolutely certain _no one was home, he fished through a drawer and pulled out one of Tohru's frilly pink aprons and put it on. He then began to bake the cake.

Cake mix. Eggs. Water. Oil.

Easy enough.

The Cat-cursed put all of the ingredients into a large bowl and set out to find the beaters.

-------------

Haru stretched and wiped the sleep from his eyes as he made his way down the stairs. He heard a loud mechanical sound coming from the kitchen and went to investigate.

There he found his lover trying to control the brown mixture in the bowl in front of him. He was already losing the fight, as there were small specks of goo sticking to the wall in front of him. Haru concluded that the beaters were on too high.

Not wanting to let this moment go to waste, Haru snuck up behind the older boy and wrapped his arms around his waist. Kyou jumped at the contact and, in the process, dropped the mixer. Chocolate cake mix covered everything in the room, including the two boys.

Haru licked at a particularly chocolately spot on the red-head's neck. At first, Kyou leaned into the touch, but then came back to his senses and turned around.

"W-what are you doing home Haru?"

"Came back after homeroom. Didn't feel like being in school today."

The Ox-cursed again started licking at his chocolate-covered-Kyou and Kyou finally gave in. Haru no sooner has his cousin pinned against the counter than they were interrupted by giggling in the doorway.

The two turned to see Shigure with half-amusement at the boys' public displays of affection and half-sorrow at his destroyed kitchen in his eyes.

Kyou blushed slightly and turned away. Haru, completely indifferent toward the intrusion, continued with his previous task. He paused only when he heard a "Take it upstairs, boys…" from the Dog-cursed.

The younger boy happily obliged and picked Kyou up bridal-style. On his way up to their shared bedroom, Haru whispered to his lover, "Next time you cook, I'll be more than happy to help."

(A/N) My longest one yet! Yay! Well, I hope you liked it! Feedback and requests are much appreciated!


	9. TheBeginning of A Beautiful Relationship

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: The Beginning of A Beautiful Relationship

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou

Word Count: 400

Rating: R

Genre: Humor/Romance (it seems they all are…)

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

Notes: I give all the credit for this to Ron White.

* * *

Kyou lay on the couch half asleep. It was raining hard outside and it had sapped all of his energy. So much so, that he had slept through his alarm clock and had not woken up for school. He therefore skipped.

The Cat-cursed was awake when three o'clock rolled around. He knew that the others would be home soon, so he tried to get a few more minutes of sleep.

When Kyou opened his eyes, he was face-to-face with Hatsuharu who sat on the floor staring at him. The Ox-cursed had obviously been watching him sleep.

"What the hell are you doing?" Kyou asked sleepily, but with hints of irritation in his voice.

"Waiting for you to wake up." was the simple response.

"Why?"

"I want to go do something."

"Go by yourself." Kyou turned to face the back of the couch away from Haru.

"Why don't you want to go?"

"Why do you _want_ to go?" The older boy was starting to lose his patience.

"I want to go out with you."

Kyou flipped back to his original position. "You mean like a date?"

"Yeah."

"What about your precious _Yuki_? I thought you liked him."

"Well, I don't." Haru reached up and whispered seductively in Kyou's ear. "I like you now."

There was moment of awkward silence.

"So…?" While he was waiting for an answer, Haru's expression remained completely indifferent.

"No." The read-head once again turned his back to his cousin.

"Why?"

"Because I'm not gay, you stupid Cow!"

"Oh, my dear Kitty, everyone's gay. But the question is to what degree?"

"I am NOT gay, damn it!" Kyou sat up and pounded his fist on the couch's armrest.

"Alright then, answer me this. Do you watch porn?"

"…yes…"

"And do you watch girl-on-girl?"

"No…just heterosexual." The cat-cursed was starting to wonder where Haru was going with this.

"The do you like it when the guy has a small penis?"

"No. I like a big, hard, throb-" Kyou stopped mid-sentence and Hatsuharu smirked.

"I rest my case." Haru patted his cousin on the back. "Sorry you had to find out this way…"

Kyou was in utter shock. He couldn't believe that he had just said such a thing. He was completely speechless.

"I'll give you a moment alone." Haru stood and headed for the door. Just before he exited, Kyou spoke up.

"Hey Haru?"

"Hm?"

"Dinner or a movie?"

* * *

(A/N) This is one of my personal favorites so far. I must say, Ron White is a genius. Anyways, this will be the last update for at least a week. I have a bunch of finals coming up and I'm not doing exactly great in most of my classes. But have no fear! I will be back once summer vacation commences! Feedback and requests are much appreciated! 


	10. PreProm

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Pre-Prom

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou

Word Count: 363

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Humor/Romance

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

* * *

"Hey Kyou-koi! Come here!" Haru yelled to his boyfriend who was currently downstairs. A few moments of silence passed and his Kitty soon burst into their shared bedroom.

"What?"

"Your clothes for tonight. You like?" he motioned toward the red garment on the bed. Kyou just stared at it.

"Well, try it on." Kyou remained silent.

"Come on, Kyou. Put it on."

"Hell no!" the older boy finally spoke.

"You told me that you would wear whatever I picked out for you."

"I didn't think that it would be a dress!" Kyou glared daggers at the offending garment on the bed, hoping that it would somehow spontaneously combust.

"Just put it on."

"No." the red-head (orange-head?) stated simply, crossing his arms like a spoiled child.

Haru sat down and sighed. "Kyou, you suck…and not in the good way…at least not now. Maybe later."

The Cat-cursed rolled his eyes. "You're hilarious."

"I know." Haru stood up and embraced the older boy from behind. "You're so lucky to be with someone as funny and sexy as me." He flicked his tongue over his boyfriend's ear and earned a shiver in response. Kyou whimpered when Haru moved away.

"Now put the dress on." This was more of an order than a suggestion.

"I already told you! No!"

"Alright, but there will be consequences. If you don't, you're not getting any for…let's make it three weeks."

Kyou's eyes widened and then narrowed. "You wouldn't _dare_."

"Watch me." Kyou could tell that the Ox-cursed was on the verge of turning Black.

"You bastard! I'm in heat and you know it!"

"So?"

"You wouldn't be able to make it three weeks." There wasn't much fight left in the uke's voice.

"We'll see about that…"

The older boy sighed in defeat. "I'll put the damn dress on." This earned Kyou a pat on the head.

"That's a good Kitty."

* * *

(A/N) A little OOC, I know, but I hoped you liked it anyways! Feedback and requests are much appreciated! 


	11. Haru's Plan

Of Those Deceived By The Rat

Title: Haru's Plan

Author: rabid-yaoi-fangirl101

Pairing: Haru/Kyou

Word Count: 342

Rating: R

Genre: Humor/Romance

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket, and sadly, I don't think I ever will.

Notes: Just a warning, my friend that read this found it pretty disturbing. I can't imagine why…

* * *

Hatsuharu had a…well, let's just all it a _thing_. He wanted to make it with Kyou in every room in the house. Kyou, though, knew nothing about Haru's plan. However, he did find it quite odd when the younger boy suggested that they do it in Shigure's room. And in Yuki's room. And on the front porch. (How they managed to pull that one off without getting caught, no one knew.)

The only room left for the couple to christen in the house was Tohru's room.

At first, Kyou objected to the idea. He knew damn well that if she ever found out that it would eternally scar her virginal mind. Somehow, Haru, with his manipulative ways, convinced the Cat-cursed to give in.

It was Saturday afternoon and Tohru was out shopping with her friends. Haru saw it as the perfect time to use her room.

------

The two were happily going at it, Haru repeatedly pounding into the body below him. They both were being as quiet as possible, as the other occupants of the house (excluding Tohru) were just downstairs.

Kyou was nearing his peak when Tohru entered the room and threw her bag on the floor by the door. Her brand new iPod was blaring in her ears and she was lip-syncing passionately-with her eyes closed- to the song that was currently playing. The boys in the room, though, were completely oblivious to the world around them and failed to notice the intruder.

Tohru, exhausted from her long day of shopping, flopped onto her bed and the two that occupied it. There was a puff of smoke and for the first time, the girl noticed that she wasn't alone. When she realized what position the now Cat and Ox were in, she panicked and ran out of the room.

Needless to say, this left Kyou in a _very _uncomfortable position, as Haru was now more than ten times his size.

Kyou screamed. "Fuck, Haru! Get it out!"

In the end, this whole ordeal did eternally scar Tohru's virginal mind.

* * *

(A/N) Very sorry about the lack of updates. Damn summer homework's got me working my ass off. Plus, I've had major writer's block, so requests are much needed and appreciated at this point. Reviews are also appreciated! 


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